Monday, August 13, 2012

Run to Him

 Ray and I have had five weeks of company while preparing two very different booths for the upcoming gift buying season.
Today is the first day without an extra person in the house. My house looks like a war zone and I really can't blame the company. So I find myself weary and overwhelmed.
The day by and large was a good one. A really upbeat staff lunch with a meeting with a forward thrust. so excited about all of the new plans and changes. I love my job.
In fact, I love company and I thoroughly enjoy turning trash into treasure.
The booth at Antiques on Main in Woodbury is chocked full of primitives and vintage items while the booth at Traders Mall in Thomaston has some of my shabby chic items. That booth is shared with Cathy Clark who has a whole lot more going on than I do,
So I am blessed!  Then why do I feel like I have been run over by a bus?
I am quicker to recognize it now. It is because too often I have tried to keep all of the balls in the air in my own strength. In variably when I run out of steam, I run to my false comforter. For me that is sugar or carbs. However, it is as dangerous as if I went on an alcoholic binge. It means highs, lows, insulin and muscle pain.
During the five weeks I went on a modified Daniel Fast successfully. So how is it that I can hit bottom again?
Finally I know the answer. The pieces are coming together.I turn to the end of the Book and find out we win!
Revelations 12:10-12
10 And I heard a loud voice saying in heaven, Now is come salvation, and strength, and the kingdom of our God, and the power of his Christ: for the accuser of our brethren is cast down, which accused them before our God day and night.
11 And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony; and they loved not their lives unto the death.
12 Therefore rejoice, ye heavens, and ye that dwell in them. Woe to the inhabiters of the earth and of the sea! for the devil is come down unto you, having great wrath, because he knoweth that he hath but a short time.
 So I am quick to repent. Quick to run to my Father who forgives me, loves me in my mess.and restores me.
I used to run the other way, but no more. No matter how much of His love I receive, there is more. It's not all for me. It is to pour out as well.
Allow Him to raise you up.

Saturday, August 4, 2012

Humpty-Dumpty Kind of Faith

But without faith [it is] impossible to please [him]: for he that cometh to God must believe that he is, and [that] he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him.Hebrews 11:6

Two of my granddaughters are here. School starts in a couple of weeks and I want so badly to make sure that they have everything they need for school.
My mother and grandmother would make clothes for me and my sister to assure that the first week of school I would have a new outfit every day.
Well, I can sew a straight line, but that is about it. I gave up early because every time I would try, my grandmother would rip it out and tell me to do it again. So the joy of sewing was just not there.
Ray and I have bought some clothes and some school supplies, but I want to do so much more. Also, I want make sure they have brand new tennis shoes, awesome book bags and a few other things. They have not asked or even hinted for a single thing.
They are so grateful for what they have received.
I had to catch myself, because I was tormenting myself by looking at MY resources rather than Father God. Can I not trust Him to provide the things they need after I have done all that I can do?
He is a rewarder of them that diligently seek HIM, not deals, maneuvering of the family budget. Seek Him. As much as I love these girls, He loves them so much more. So once again I release them and their needs to Him.
When I seek His hands rather than His face, my focus is skewed. It is a heart issue and if my focus is wrong then I have that Humpty-dumpty kind of faith that makes you scramble to try to get it all together again. His answers are always found when we let go and trust Him.