Fruitcake Bashing

Several years ago there was serious fruitcake bashing. Anyone who ate it was considered a freak. This led to fruitcake jokes like:A fruitcake walks into a bar, throws himself on the counter, the fruitcake breaks in to pieces. "What are you, nuts?", said the bartender. "Yes, and jellies and fruits" - the fruitcake replied before the bartender yelled,"Look, get out of here, you reek of rum!" "I'll be back next year, and every year", shouted the fruitcake.
People have said that the only good use for a fruitcake was a doorstop. but I LOVE fruitcake.
Perhaps it is because it conjures up memories of Christmas past. Both my grandmother and mother made fruitcakes. They lined the many loaf pans with heavy brown paper- often grocery bags. It took several days to prep and bake and wrap.
They were a treasured gift among extended family memories. I even remember my mom hiding it. It was no ordinary fruitcake. There was none of the bitter citron. Instead there were cherries, pineapple and lots of pecans. In fact, it was so chocked full of goodies there was little actual cake- just enough to hold it all together.
My granny never baked one, but she would take a store bought one and soak it in brandy for a week. Something my teetotaller mom would never do.
Mom doesn't make fruitcake any more.
But there is a suitable substitute in a Claxton fruitcake.
http://www.claxtonfruitcake.com
Thank goodness for the website because unless you live in their region, you are probably not going to find it on your shelves. It is moist and rich. You can only eat a little at the time. I love it ice cold from the fridge so it slices thin.
If you get fruitcake for Christmas and you hate it, send it my way. If it isn't the right one, I will doctor it up like Granny did.
Now if I could just get Sally to send me some of her buttermilk fudge, my Christmas would be complete.